anger
How to Recognise Your Emotional Red Flags
An emotional red flag is a warning sign or indicator that something in your emotional state, behavior, or thought patterns may require attention. These signals often suggest you're experiencing distress, discomfort, or unhealthy emotional responses that could lead to bigger issues if not addressed. Emotional red flags serve as cues for self-awareness and an opportunity to reflect on what’s happening inside your mind. Let’s find out the characteristics of emotional red flags and ways to recognize those in your behaviors.
Key Characteristics of Emotional Red Flags
.
Sudden Emotional Changes
Sudden emotional changes refer to rapid or unexpected shifts in a person’s emotional state. These changes can happen quickly, often without clear reasons, and may involve moving from one emotion to another, such as feeling overwhelmed, irritable, or sad without a clear reason.
These emotional fluctuations can be mild or intense and may occur due to various factors, including stress, anxiety, hormonal changes, mental health conditions, trauma, sleep deprivation, certain medications, etc.
Read more: How to Teach Students to Accept and Overcome Academic Failures
Recurrent Negative Thought Patterns
Recurrent negative thought patterns refer to repetitive, often automatic, and persistent thoughts that focus on pessimistic or self-critical ideas. These patterns can be distressing and are typically negative, leading to feelings of sadness, anxiety, or hopelessness. They often become habitual, meaning the person regularly experiences them without actively trying to and can affect mental well-being and behavior. Common types of recurrent negative thought patterns include:
- Constant Self-criticism: Harshly judging oneself, often engaging in self-blame or feelings of inadequacy.- Overthinking- Catastrophizing: Expecting the worst possible outcome.- Overgeneralization: Making broad, sweeping conclusions based on a single event or piece of evidence.- Black-and-white Thinking: Viewing situations in extremes, with no middle ground or shades of gray.- Negative Mental Filtering: Focusing only on the negative aspects of a situation and ignoring any positive ones.- Personalization: Blaming oneself for things outside of one’s control, or assuming responsibility for others’ actions or feelings.- Should Statements: Having rigid, unrealistic expectations about oneself or others, often leads to feelings of guilt or frustration when they aren't met.- Emotional Reasoning: Believing that negative emotions reflect objective reality.- Discounting the Positive: Downplaying or dismissing any positive feedback or accomplishments.- Mind Reading: Believing you know what others are thinking, often assuming they have negative thoughts about you.
Read more: Why are Suicide Rates Higher Among Men?
Avoidance Behaviors
Avoidance behavior refers to actions or strategies people use to prevent facing situations, tasks, or thoughts that make them feel anxious, uncomfortable, or stressed. This behavior is a coping mechanism that temporarily alleviates discomfort but can reinforce negative feelings or create long-term problems.
Essentially, avoidance serves as a way to escape or avoid an unpleasant emotional state, but it doesn't resolve the underlying issue. Over time, avoidance can become a habitual response, which can increase the severity of the problems it was meant to avoid.
Uncharacteristic Reactions
Uncharacteristic reactions refer to responses or behaviors that are unusual, unexpected, or not typical of how a person usually behaves or reacts in a particular situation, like overreacting to minor issues or withdrawing completely from social interactions. These reactions often differ from an individual’s usual patterns of behavior, emotional responses, or coping mechanisms.
Read more: Good Stress: What Are the Benefits of Eustress?
Uncharacteristic reactions can be triggered by various factors, including stress, trauma, illness, or emotional disturbances, and may represent a deviation from someone's normal ways of thinking, feeling, or acting.
Recognizing these signs allows you to pause, reflect, and take action to manage your emotions before they escalate into more significant problems.
Ways to Recognise Your Emotional Red Flags
Recognizing your emotional red flags is an essential step in maintaining emotional well-being and healthy relationships. Here’s a guide to help you identify them:
Track Repetitive Thoughts
Are you replaying the same negative or traumatic past experiences inside your mind again and again? Look for recurring negative thought patterns, such as Self-criticism, Catastrophizing, Blaming others, feeling victimized, etc.
Read more: 10 Ways to Ensure Emotional Well-being during Pregnancy
Monitor Changes in Behavior
Look into your actions. Notice when you start behaving differently, for example avoiding people or situations, overeating or undereating, losing motivation for tasks or hobbies you usually enjoy, etc.
Reflect on Past Experiences
Think about situations where you felt emotionally overwhelmed like extreme anger, panicking, grief, anxiety, joy, happiness, numbness, etc. over minor issues. What were the signs leading up to those overreacting or overwhelming moments?
Notice Emotional Outbursts
Reflect on moments when your emotions feel overwhelming, leading to sudden anger or irritability, crying unexpectedly, feeling numb or shutting down, etc.
Read more: Discomfort Anxiety v Depression: Differences, Ways of Prevention
Identify Triggers
Analyze your emotional outbursts to find the triggers. Try to recognize situations or interactions that consistently cause negative emotions inside your mind, such as certain people or environments, specific words or tones of voice, high-pressure situations, etc.
Keep a Journal
Write down your thoughts, feelings, and reactions. Over time, patterns may emerge, making it easier to pinpoint what sets off your emotional red flags.
You can maintain a paper or digital journal based on your preference. Nowadays, diverse free and paid journaling apps are found on Android and iOS.
Read more: Micro-acts of Joy: Secret to Being Happier and Healthier?
Ask for Feedback
Sometimes, those close to you may notice red flags you don’t. Ask trusted friends or family members if they observe any changes in your mood or behavior. It will help you recognize your mental issues before they get worse.
Track Physical Symptoms of Emotions
Emotions often trigger physical reactions. Notice if you experience: Increased heart rate, Tightness in the chest, Clenched fists or jaw, Feeling drained or restless, etc. These symptoms can indicate heightened emotional states like anger, anxiety, or fear.
To cope with the physical symptoms linked to emotions, consider strategies such as meditation, yoga, regular exercise, mindfulness, therapy, etc.
Read more: How to Spend the Weekend in a Creative Way
Conclusion
Emotional red flags are early warning signs that indicate you may be headed toward emotional distress or unhealthy behaviors. These signals often manifest in patterns of thought, feelings, or actions. Recognizing emotional red flags, you can understand the triggers and reasons for your sudden emotional outbursts, negative thought patterns, avoidance behavior, uncharacteristic attitudes, etc. Understanding the link between emotions and physical symptoms can help you better manage both mental and physical health.
However, identifying your emotional red flags isn’t about self-judgment but about understanding yourself better. Treat yourself with kindness as you work through your emotions. By becoming more attuned to your emotional red flags, you can take proactive steps to manage them and maintain emotional balance. Overall, this process can help you move toward the path of healing through mental health support, counseling, self-compassion, etc.
Read more: How to Enjoy Your Own Company: Tips to Overcome Loneliness
3 months ago
Grief gives way to anger over Turkey’s earthquake response
When Zafer Mahmut Boncuk's apartment building collapsed in Turkey's devastating earthquake, he discovered his 75-year-old mother was still alive — but pinned under the wreckage.
For hours, Boncuk frantically searched for someone in the ancient, devastated city of Antakya to help him free her. He was able to talk to her, hold her hand and give her water. Despite his pleas, however, no one came, and she died on Tuesday, the day after the quake.
Like many others in Turkey, his sorrow and disbelief have turned to rage over the sense there has been an unfair and ineffective response to the historic disaster that has killed tens of thousands of people there and in Syria.
Boncuk directed his anger at President Recep Tayyip Erdogan, especially because she seemed so close to rescue but no one came. Her remains were finally removed Sunday, nearly a week after the building collapsed. His father's body is still in the rubble.
“What would happen if it was your own mother, dear Recep Tayyip Erdogan? What happened to being a world leader? Where are you? Where?” he screamed.
“I gave her water to drink, I cleared her face of rubble. I told her that I would save her. But I failed,” said Boncuk, 60. “The last time we spoke, I asked if I should help her drink some water. She said no, so I rubbed some water on her lips. Ten minutes later, she died.”
Also Read: Turkey detains building contractors as quake deaths pass 33,000
He blamed “ignorance and lack of information and care — that’s why my mother died in front of my eyes.”
Many in Turkey express similar frustration that rescue operations have been painfully slow since the Feb. 6 quakes and that valuable time was lost during the narrow window for finding people alive.
Others, particularly in southern Hatay province near the Syrian border, say Erdogan’s government was late in delivering assistance to the hardest-hit region for what they suspect are both political and religious reasons.
In the southeastern town of Adiyaman, Elif Busra Ozturk waited outside the wreckage of a building on Saturday where her uncle and aunt were trapped and believed dead, and where the bodies of two of her cousins already had been found.
“For three days, I waited outside for help. No one came. There were so few rescue teams that they could only intervene in places they were sure there were people alive,” she said.
At the same complex, Abdullah Tas, 66, said he had been sleeping in a car near the building where his son, daughter-in-law and four grandchildren were buried. He said that rescuers had first arrived four days after the earthquake struck. The Associated Press could not independently verify his claim.
“What good is that for the people under the debris?” he asked.
Onlookers stood behind police tape Saturday in Antakya as bulldozers clawed at a high-rise luxury apartment building that had toppled onto its side.
Over 1,000 residents had been in the 12-story building when the quake struck, according to relatives watching the recovery effort. They said hundreds were still inside but complained the effort to free them had been slow and not serious.
“This is an atrocity, I don’t know what to say,” said Bediha Kanmaz, 60. The bodies of his son and 7-month-old grandson had been pulled from the building — still locked in an embrace — but his daughter-in-law was still inside.
“We open body bags to see if they’re ours, we’re checking if they’re our children. We’re even checking the ones that are torn to pieces,” she said of herself and other grief-stricken relatives.
Kanmaz also blamed Turkey’s government for the slow response, and accused the national rescue service of failing to do enough to recover people alive.
She and others in Antakya expressed the belief that the presence of a large minority of Alevis — an Anatolian Islamic community that differs from Sunni and Shia Islam and Alawites in Syria — had made them a low priority for the government. Traditionally, few Alevis vote for Erdogan’s ruling party. There was no evidence, however, that the region was overlooked for sectarian reasons.
Erdogan said Wednesday that disaster efforts were continuing in all 10 affected provinces and dismissed allegations of no help from state institutions like the military as “lies, fake slander.”
But he has acknowledged shortcomings. Officials said rescue efforts in Hatay were initially complicated by the destruction of the local airport’s runway and bad road conditions.
Anger over the extent of the destruction, however, is not limited to individuals. Turkish authorities have been detaining or issuing detention warrants for dozens of people allegedly involved in the construction of buildings that collapsed, and the justice minister has vowed to punish those responsible.
Kanmaz blamed negligence on the part of the developer of the apartment building where her family had been killed.
“If I could wrap my hands around the contractor’s neck, I would tear him to shreds,” she said.
That contractor, who oversaw the construction of the 250-unit building, was detained at Istanbul Airport on Friday before boarding a flight out of the country, Turkey’s official Anadolu news agency reported. On Saturday, he was formally arrested. His lawyer suggested the public was looking for a scapegoat.
In multiethnic southern Turkey, other tensions are rising. Some expressed frustration that Syrian refugees who fled to the region from their devastating civil war are burdening the sparse welfare system and competing for resources with Turkish people.
“There are many poor people in Hatay, but they don’t offer us any welfare; they give it to the Syrians. They give so much to the Syrians,” Kanmaz said. “There are more Syrians than Turks here.”
There were signs Saturday the tensions could be boiling over.
Two German aid groups and the Austrian Armed Forces temporarily interrupted their rescue work in the Hatay region citing fears for the safety of their staff. They resumed work after the Turkish army secured the area, the Austrian Defense Ministry spokesman tweeted.
“There is increasing tension between different groups in Turkey,” Lt. Col. Pierre Kugelweis of the Austrian Armed Forces told the APA news agency. “Shots have reportedly been fired.”
German news agency dpa reported that Steven Berger, chief of operations of the aid group I.S.A.R. Germany, said that “it can be seen that grief is slowly giving way to anger” in Turkey’s affected regions.
For Kanmaz, it was a mixture of grief and anger.
“I’m angry. Life is over,” she said. “We live for our children; what matters most to us is our children. We exist if they exist. Now we are over. Everything you see here is over.”
____
Emrah Gurel in Adiyaman, Turkey, Zeynep Bilginsoy in Istanbul, Suzan Fraser in Ankara, Turkey, and Kirsten Grieshaber in Berlin contributed.
2 years ago